The prize of announcing the birth of a little one is amazing! And it
can be taken in an instant by a well-meaning family member, friend, or doula.
When this happens, something very special is stolen from the parents.
They have just gone through an intense labor; a marathon was just conquered. They are high on oxytocin and exhausted beyond comprehension. They are so excited to tell the world about the little human they have just brought earth side… only to find that a friend has already stolen the opportunity. Disappointment ensues; maybe some frustration and heartache.
Family and friends have every right to be excited about the birth of a loved one, but we must remember that the right goes to the parents, every time. Period. We must take a step back, recognize that the parents are center stage, and let them shine during this exciting time in their lives. Once they have announced the birth, then ASK if you can also announce.
I have had clients who intentionally didn’t tell their family that they had been in labor for FIFTEEN HOURS. It wasn’t until the baby was almost here that they asked me to call their parents to come to the hospital. My clients didn’t want ANYONE to know, and they
specifically requested me to ask the family to not post on social media.
This is a big deal, y’all. It matters.
And doulas need to pay attention, too. They may not realize it, but I’ve seen them accidentally announce the birth of their client’s babies. They post a seemingly simple post, or check-in at a hospital, only to steal the prize from their clients.
I am not exempt from the face palm fury. I have done it too! Before I became a doula, I announced that my sister was in labor. And as a new doula, I posted on my Facebook page about how excited I was to get up early and drive to the hospital for a birth. You best believe I have mutual friends with my clients. And even if we don’t have mutual friends, it is a dangerous game we are playing, because we all know nothing is private on the internet.
Our clients are happy to know that we are excited about their births, but I guarantee some will not be happy to see it posted on social media. To me, posting my excitement about my client’s births on social media is not worth potentially damaging our client-doula relationship.
Birth is exciting.
It is magical, and wondrous, and PRIVATE.
At Foothills Family Doulas, we respect our client, their family, AND their privacy. We will never post on our business or personal pages about births, without expressed permission from our clients. And they like it that way.
Rest assured, your secrets are safe with us.
Download this cute (but direct) graphic to share on your social media accounts! Your friends and family with get the hint 😉